no more milk here, folks

Noah nursed for the last time about a week ago.  I don’t even remember which morning was the final session, but I think it was either Sunday or Monday.  This latest virus really knocked us all on our asses.  Nursing while congested is hard enough on a baby on its own; add to the mix a slower letdown and probable low milk supply and you’ve got a downright unhappy baby.  I figured getting his milk via a bottle would be much easier on him than having to work hard nursing; and as sick as Noah was, I wanted to do all I could to make him comfortable (and, if I’m being honest here, my confidence with nursing hadn’t been very high since Thanksgiving time).  Noah surprisingly nursed long and hard last Saturday morning, which ended up being the day he came down with a fever and cold.  I like to think that it was as if he understood it was going to be one of the last times, but more likely, it was probably just due to being sick!  In any event, it was a good way to end that relationship and we haven’t looked back since.

We made it to the 7 month mark and, when you consider everything we went through with the breastfeeding experience, I am happy with that.  Of course, when I look at other moms at playgroup who are still nursing, I do still get that pang of sadness and guilt that comes with formula feeding; and, I realize, I’m jealous of them, too.  But then on the other hand, it’s been pretty nice to now have the option of Pete taking the first feed; it’s great to have my body and boobs back; to not worry about pumping before going to yoga in the morning if Noah is still asleep; to not have to cart my pumping equipment with me whenever I’m going to be away from Noah for longer than 3 hours; to get a night away from the baby with no worries about drinking and then pumping/dumping.  There was no clogged ducts, engorgement, or pain in the weaning process, which is so awesome.

Breastfeeding mamas should be rewarded, commended, and compensated for all they go through to feed their child.  It certainly wasn’t easy; and with a weight gain issue and shaky support system it made it that much harder.  If we happen to be blessed with another child in the near future, I will definitely try again with the hope that the second time around will be more successful!  And, if we face challenges again and breastfeeding doesn’t end up working for us, then I will feel comfortable with our decision to switch to formula, because we’ve been through it all before.

I start my new job next Friday (2/15), and I will be so so glad to leave my breast pump equipment at home!